Dungeon Siege Movie

Uwe Boll, the director of the new upcoming Dungeon Siege Movie, was once quoted to saying that he wanted to make a movie as epic as Lord of the Rings. It was at that moment that the collective hope of fans, praying that the movie might be good, was destroyed. Already, since the release of the trailer, there has been huge outpourings of hate on what a disaster it will be. One fan on aintitcool.com's talkback feature said it was a bunch of LOTR scenes put together in one.

Now, i'm not one to always jump to conclusions but the resume of Uwe Boll does not favor well in his regard. BloodRayne and Alone in the dark are his creations. Need I say more?

He could have said a lot of things. "I just want to tell a good story," could have been one. "I want to give some quality Fantasy Tolkein would be proud of," is another one he could have shot at us. No, instead he wants to make another fast and the furious. He wants to make bad boys 2. Instead of giving us hope into good characters, he gives us Mortal Combat 5.

-Longbow

Gaming and the big battles

If you've never delved into the obscene vice which is the MMORPG then you've been missing alot. MMORPG stands for Massive Multiplayer Onling Roleplaying Game, also known as sucking an obscene amount of money monthly while provides tiny bits of content to keep them hooked. And, while this appraisal may be unkind, I assure you it is not far from the truth. While the original MMORPG was Merdian 59, the first mainstream one was in the infamous EverQuest. You know the one. You heard the story of that kid who died, then the news agencies found he had like 6 Everquest accounts. BULLSHIT!

I digress, even before I go off on that tangent. The massive multiplayer has been the sucktube for all those Fantasy Fans who either didn't have to balls to rack up a D&D set or just couldn't find anyone interested. And, while the level-me-now and hunt-for-items have been the mainstay of the EverQuest clones, it has been a tad bit overdone. Don't know what I'm talking about? Sure you do.

Lets move on.

If anything Lord of the Rings have given us, it's the selfinduced coma we all achieve when we imagine that perfect massive battle with elves, dwarven Lords and kings. Dark Ages of Camelot tried to sate this innate desire so did games like Shadowbane. But it always lacked the technology component necessary to achieve such things. To dumb it down, for those not intune with the MMORPG landscape... Imagine Xbox online, where the games can span to 4v4 on most of their games. (with exceptions of course) Then imagine Counterstrike where you can have like 8v8 and still other PC games that can have like 16v16. Got the image? That's right. Now pound you head against the desk and imagine 300v300. That's what you'll get with games like Shadowbane and the upcoming Darkfall. Drooling yet? I thought so.

And yet, I find myself wonder how fast the server will crash when it happens. For those not following along, NO single game has been able to solve the "massive battle" crash. DAOC failed, Shadowbane Failed, World of Warcraft failed. And yet that massive battle is what we dream of; play endless hours for. Not the battle specifically but the dream that there's something bigger in that game, that there's a whole world you can be a part of, effect and change.

But maybe its just me. I still dream of that big battle. Here's hoping Darkfall won't be a bust as well.

-Long"Talking to those who already know what i'm talking about"bow

What's with all the Dragons?

Dragon Sword, Dragon Quest, Dragon Heart, Dragon Slayer, Dungeons and Dragons and Dragonheart 2! What do all these have in common? They are all B movies and/or major motion pictures. In fact if you look at what percentage of fantasy movies being made, you'll find that 90%+ percent of those movies will be about dragons! Don't get me wrong, I love the Dragon. I loved the AM's Perm series as a kid and the DnD books always gave a decent viewing of those mythical creatures... BUT COME ON! How much more can we, as consumers, take? When did fantasy HAVE to be about dragons?

Look, I get it, I really do. If you consider from a "realistic" point of view, a movie about dragons does kinda make sense. It gives you that FX effect without having to create a whole battle full of different characters, it simplifies your stories being that you don't have to create intricate storylines around multiple plotlines and it gives you that "Epic" feel. BUT what it also does is instant portray it as a complete copout. I mean let's face it, the only reason Dragons are so cool is because their ABSENCE not their complete showing-every-scene-in-every-frame. What makes Dragons so unquie is that you hear about them in whispers, you hear about their feats from survivors from the latest attack and then when you finally see them, they are great! In this, Eragon does hold some small value (if i'm assuming that's how they wrote the book because i never got through the whole thing).

The Scifi "Dragon" movie of the week isn't the greatest of comparisons but it does parallel what is a misinterpretation of the Fantasy Genre. Then again, maybe the "Dragon" thing is Fantasy's version of the "Star Trek" cliche.

-Longbow

Orson Scott Card and Scifi

For those unfamilar with the work of OSC, he wrote Ender's Game. For those that have never heard of Ender's game, you should just kill yourself now. What is ender's game? Think of Harry Potter on Crack. But, the key is here, Ender's game was written like 20 years or so before HP ever even was thought up of. When you think, "Rise To power" You think Ender's game as a stepping stone to that cliche.

I digress, i'm not here to talk about the glory of Ender's Game. (Even though it rocks) I'm here to talk about what OSC said in one of his interviews. He said that, when he was starting out, he wrote this one short story about a boy liberating a town (or something like that) Preety standard stuff. Boy saves town yadda yadda yadda. But, when he submitted it to a publisher it got rejected on the grounds that it wasn't, "Scifi enough." What did they mean? OSC explains that even though he described, in ornate detail, the wierd planet this story was proposed on, it did not contain any Scifi qualities that made up something of Science Fiction.

In this, I kinda agree with OSC. While you don't need magic in EVERY Fantasy story, it cannot be just a story without a staple from the genra. It's not enough for a boy to save the day, he has to do it in the context of Fantasy, to distinguish it from a "present-day" story.

Ok, i'm ranting and this probably isn't making much sense. I'll stop now.

-Lonbow

Tolkien's Elves

One might not fully comprehend how Tolkein set the standard. One might not even realize how influencial his work was and, how it limited fantasy right off the get go. I mean look at Star Trek and the Vulcans; tall, elegant and with an unearthly beauty. Sound familar? How about the so-called Standard of the Dungeons and Dragons/Forgotten Realms Series? Andre Norton and the With World's Green People of the Valley?

They're more than just another fantasy race but a standard of that boy discovering the vale of the elves for the first time, a la Frodo. It's that cliche that all fantasy must ALWAYS be about discovering a new fantastical world that is different from anything ever imagined. Don't believe me? Go to your local bookstore (Borders for me) and just stroll down the isle and look at the backcovers for books. Sure you'll find the morsals of goodness that don't revolve around Eragon crap but the magority's centered around this fake ideal of, "The land of the elves." Oh lets talk to talking dragons! Lets Dance with the Fairies. And yet when you look at the Fantasy Best Sellers, outside of the Potter Clones, most of them are about something more.

Tolkien's Elves are an anchor, weighing down into some primal belief that angels walk among us. World of Warcraft proves this in their oh-so cliche Elves. Hell, even their dark Elves contain in them an elegant beauty that follows the trend.

Why am I putting such a big deal about this? Because this is how people thought of Science Fiction in media back in the beginnings of Television. People thought, "Scifi is only for the children." How many watched those black and whites about that space hero fighting intergalactic foes? Millions. (I forgot the name of that show) And yet today Scifi explores adult themes previously unencountered, opening storylines that intrigue the imagination. How many engineers have been influenced by Star Trek? Hundreds! Even in the upper escholons you'll find a couple of them! Scifi allowed for the technology boom, opened people eyes to what was possible.

Don't get me wrong, Fantasy will never achieve that kind of status. Instead, Fantasy is the opportunity for viewers to get out of their daily lives and live the tales that people long ago told. Fantasy can give that escape from the dolldrums of life by indulging your senses to Roman Drama without the cliche Costumes, into the European, "Game of Thrones" and thrust you into worlds where generals die at the hands of tyrants.

-Longbow

Gaming and Fantasy

Let me say this once, Dungeons and Dragons and the BEST and WORST thing that could ever have happened to Fantasy and Gaming. What is it about what is termed, "Mainstream" and what is considered the minority? Sure, we'll welcome High Fantasy in the form of LOTR (One of the largest grossing series of ALL TIME) and yet we'll only make Child Fantasy from that point forward. I digress, DnD did wonders for Fantasy Gaming and RPGs in general. Without the tabletop DnD there would be no Everquest or World of Warcraft but a pleathora of FPSs that all look the same.

What are the downfalls? The incessant need for Fantasy Gaming to concentrate on the mundane and the irrelvant, i.e. the uber-shiny-powerful-magic sword. A writing in writer's digest once said, "Fantasy is the reexamination of human emotion." Instead we are driven by some materialistic need to, "Keep up with the Joneszes" I hate Everquest. If I wanted to play a single player game, i'd bust out my old nintendo. Sure, I get what's so appealing about it but isn't killing the same big monsters over and over, boring? I want dynamics! I want EPIC Fantasy!

Why are games like World of Warcraft so succesful out of the bat? Why are movies like LOTR, "Mainstream," in every sense of the word? BECAUSE FANTASY IS MAINSTREAM! People mistake some child RTP story as fantasy. When you ask the average person what's fantasy, They'll say a child with a magic sword. But Fantasy was more than that to Tolkein. Fantasy is more than that to G.R.R. Martin. Fantasy is more than that to Anne M. It's allowing yourself to meet that new creature born of pure evil. It's enveloping your world with that Fantasic World of Commerce melded with Nature. It's that king, sitting on the thorne, debating the inconsistancies int he world about him.

What's Fantasy? It's Shadowbane. It's Darkfall. Most of all, It's emotion.

-Longbow

Raymond E. Feist

What was the first successful RPG on the PC? The Answer is the adaptation of REF's Kronodor Series (Or however u spell it). I've read quite a bit of his stuff through the years and, although it's not the most indepth, "Care about the characters" type of story, I found myself idlying flipping the pages in interest. The obscene thing about REF is that he almost distances the reader from the character. Hell most of his books reads like a video game more than an actual novel, which is refreshing because he gives no false pretences about trying to make a "Chracter Driven Story." In this, it's almost like he's trying to be more like the Scifi genre. His Kronodor (Again, spelling :P) Series reads like quests. At most points in the story, the main character would meet someone, get a questlike tale, then go to a place, fight monsters, then get an important clue! Sound like a quest to you?

If anything, I found it fun and refreshing from the emotional moshpit which seems to be what i normally delve into. Maybe that's why REF's Betrayl at K, was the first award winning RPG on the PC.

-Longbow

Eragon

Now I don't mean to blast another author because there's nothing as impressive (or uplifting) than an 18 year old writing a fantasy novel, getting it published, and getting a movie deal. BUT, this atrocious HALFASSRIPOFF of good fantasy epics is going too far. I had a friend who bought the book (yes a friend, not me) and i took a run through and, while it had a good hook, was caulk full of wishful thinking and ripoffs.

Lets take the name for one, Eragorn? Aragorn? Anyone? I mean the guy doesn't even hide it. Oh and 10 bucks that he's Pern Novels on his shelf, linded up one by one. I mean they've been talking to AM for years about making movies/animations of her popular Pern Series but never got around to it. The RTP thing is a bit much because they've been dozens and yes i mean DOZENS of novels about dragonriders in which you can take this novel and go scene by scene.

What started me on this rampage? The Trailer is up. And, while I hope it dawned to follow the quality of HP and LOTR, it instead desired to hire an actor from the HORRID Dungeons and Dragons fame. Jeremy Irons? COME ON! that ship's sailed longggg ago. And John Malcovich? How less powerful an actor can you get? Don't get me wrong, by no means is JM a bad actor but he's demanor is better suited for stuff like Con Air more than a face of a movie villan. He's too soft spoken. If they treated his character like THe villian in Gladiator, that'd be one thing. But not, he's supposed to be that cliche badguy that chases a boy who has an inherant destiny. This movie won't tank but, like it or not, it won't do good either.

-Longbow

Rise to Power versus Deeply Depressing

Lets face it, a whole bunch of fantasy fans got into the genre in the first place by reading a rise to power type of novel. What's a Rise to Power Novel? You know the type, and no I'm not talking about that kiddy fantasy movie not-to-be-spoken-of.

The basic jist is boy lives life, supplanted by boy realizes power supplanted by boy rises the ranks. Ok, ok, I get ahead of myself because lts face it, "Boy" is usually "girl." But that's another topic for another day. Lets get back on topic, L.E.Modisett and his Recluse series, Harry Potter and Enders game are all ones we've all fallen in love with, based on our generation. I have some friends that remember when Ender's game was the first book they read, which got them into Scifi, or even kids today who tell me about HP, blah blah blah. Not to mention the Dragonlance/Forgotten Realms series, every other book is the Rise-To-Power mantra.

And then theirs DD, deeply depressing. Ever heard of Robin Hobb? Me, like many male fantasy fools (mff) found themselves enticed by the title, "Assassin's Quest." I said to myself... "hey! Assasins! Cool!" Then you read the first couple chapters and it's about this kid who's being persecuted, then turns into an Assassin. 6 books later your crying to yourself late at night, realizing the whole series is just making this character's life into a living hell.

A more up-to-date version would be George R. R. Martin's creation and his lately one "Feast of Crows." Talk about depressing! At one point in the 2nd book, he litterally KILLED OFF EVERY SINGLE MAIN CHARACTER. (With exceptions of course) And, like a sap, I was first in line to preorder my copy of his next stringyoualong novel.

But, while the RTP books got me into Fantasy initally, I feel myself drawn to the DD books. Not because of i cut myself at night, (dramatic pause) but because I feel more reading each page, I feel and care about the character that much more. Maybe it's just me, but I the Dragonlance "Lets say Sorcercer 10 times per paragraph to entice the readers," style of novels just don't do anything for me anymore.

-Longbow